Realities of a Teenage Drama Princess :)

You only live once   Hello :) :P you just don’t know how that brightens my day… every time… I intend to say these to you tomorrow… *hopefully* why still post it? Well, since my memory fails me a lot… it would be good to actually write it down… for future references :P why here? I think it’s a good enough story to let the whole world know :D (or just kuya patch, since he’s the only one reading. fair enough kuya patch?) GAME! let me start by telling how distrustful I am with men. hmmm. MEN. xD haha Well the story goes way beyond when dinosaurs ruled the earth. but seriously… I think everyone knows that story already and I don’t want to really go there again for the nth time haha soo.. let me just say.. I was 15 and somebody told me he love me and I believed him.   (yup, that’s yours taylor swift) annnd. I took his words and I believed in everything he said to me… (fine last na yan, that’s from who knew by pink) SERIOUSLY. tsk. it’s just hard to be serious when you’re typ...

here i am swallowing whatever it is that needed to be swallowed and saying what's really up. why on a blog post? just because! idreallykwhy. and it took me a lot of courage just to make sure you're going to be able to read this so... i expect something in return. xD like ahmm a reply? THANK YOU! ;) and mke it easier please. xD ang hirap lang kasi nito.. idk why i didn't just message you with this and still decided on posting this here but eto na eh so xD :)) why can't you just say what you mean? or is that what you mean.... i thought we got past this already.. yet here we are again. not saying the things that are needed to be said or at least the things we wanted to say. xD I'd be lying if i am to say I am COMPLETELY over it. because after years, you are still one of the persons that comes into mind whenever i hear the word LOVE. I know that's not fair because after all.. haha but seriously.. i compare every guy who comes along to you... and somehow i am still...

why think. it's over. why study? it's unnecessary :)) love is really not meant for two BABY :)) *of course except for you two hannah and chi* but of course it is NOT meant for two kids acting like mommy and daddy already. :) everything was just so liberating. LORD. thank you for so much :)

I normally share my blog posts in facebook. but this post won't be shared. well because... i'm shy hahaha just like a 14 year old. i have a crush on someone in facebook. :P These words are not from me but this is how i feel exactly. BTW... he is the only one i do this with :) I love ‘poking’ you on Facebook. Because of you, suddenly Facebook ‘pokes’ seem less stupid. Until I met you, the ‘poke’ was just an annoying relic to which the Western world’s most mature social network seemed stubbornly to cling, an element to imagine as interesting only to ‘tweens,’ but now whenever it says you have ‘poked’ me I want to poke you back immediately. I want you to never again have to wait long for me to click ‘poke back,’ because I want you to kinda smile the way that I do and I log in and it says “[You] have poked [me],” with your name in luminous, linkable blue text to remind me that you are a real person who is thinking about me. You make me wish that there was some kind of ‘next l...

it's 4:00 AM. i have to wake up in approximately 4 hours. yet here i am typing. well you know that quote that says... “Those who  mind  don't matter, and  those who matter  don't  mind .”  i am kind of having that situation right now. It's no big deal if you look at it in some angle but it is one if taken at another. so let me just say this once and for all. Honestly, i don't really care for that person. i don't care who he likes or who he goes out with. as long as , i see my picture still there i am contented. but not only did he removed it but he also deleted me. now that is another story. is he someone? but i am sure he is not. i always listed him under the guys who won't get serious even after marriage. but for that girl he gave up everything? i feel really insecure. but then again. i'm fine. knowing that the reason he or should i say she deleted me is because i was a threat. so thank you. for making me feel pretty haha and btw. she is really pr...

nope not gonna post the lighters. which as currently typing I am LSS-ed with. We both lie silently still in the dead of the night Although we both lie close together We feel miles apart inside Was it something I said or something I did Did the words not come out right Though I tried not to hurt you Though I tried But I guess that's why they say Every rose has its thorn Just like every night has its dawn Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song Every rose has its thorn Yeah it does I listen to our favorite song playing on the radio Hear the DJ say loves a game of easy come and easy go But I wonder does he know Has he ever felt like this And I know you'd be here right now If I could have let you know somehow I guess Though it's been a while now I can still feel so much pain Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals but the scar, that scar remains I know I could have saved ...

I can’t believe that it has been a month since I turned 18. many things had happened. bith good and bad. depending on how you’ll view it.  anyway, I have to sleep and I’m just gonna say directly what I want to say. I’m over it. I’m done. I’m done telling myself that everyone is like you. I’m willing to get hurt again. I’m tearing my walls down so somebody will be able to reach me. I’m DONE. you have no hold in me what so ever, I’m ready to live my life the way it should be.

so I’m back. to my “normal” quiet boring saturday nights. my family just left a couple of hours ago.   I know I promised my blog –was gonna say readers but I don’t think I have one YET sooo anyway- that I am going to write again. BUT my heart is still not ready to write something other than this. sooo for tonight I’ll post this.   BTW. for that guy. I NEED YOU. where are you? are you purposely doing this? AM I THE ONLY ONE who felt something DIFFERENT? I miss you. write me soon…

I don’t know if this is really me right now. but I just have to say it. MAYBE I don’t really miss YOU at all. I miss ME missing YOU. that’s why I get so confuse. “she’s nothing like me” “because she’s not you” I GET IT.  THANKS!   PS. who needs closure when it’s already THROWN AWAY?!

I am STILL right here. exactly where you left me. wait. nope. i subliminally had come back from exactly where i thought you'll still be.

yes i have been doing nothing but listening to music AND remembering a lot. well i think it's quite necessary. the year is almost over. isn't it the right time to be remembering all the good stuffs that has happened? though this song, reminds me a lot. Back to december - Taylor Swift I'm so glad you made time to see me How's life, tell me how's your family I haven't seen them in a while You've been good, busier then ever We small talk, work and the weather Your guard is up and I know why 'Cause the last time you saw me Is still burned in the back of your mind You gave me roses and I left them there to die So this is me swallowing my pride, Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night And I'd go back to december all the time It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you Wishing that I'd realized what I had when you were mine I'd go back to december, turn around and make it all right and I go back...

i was in love. i don't know if i'm still. but it doesn't change it. i WAS in love. with you. i was  AM young. i WAS in love in the idea of love .   i know i am still. but not that much. Cause I still don't know how to act Don't know what to say Still wear the scars like it was yesterday But you're long gone and moved on Cause you're long gone But I still don't know where to start, still finding my way Still talk about you like it was yesterday But you're long gone and moved on But you're long gone, you moved on are you really long gone and moved on?  *honestly i didn't know that that is what's playing while i was typing this. the script got me into this. 

this day is so weird. I SWEAR! anyway.. this post is meant for HIM. i know right after everything that had happened. i can still manage to write about him. to think about him even. am i really not over him? is he still in here ---> <3 omo omo wait i cant continue this yet coz someones being weird and for the record its not just ME. anyway. i want to really write this. the feel of me writing will soon be gone. I know what happen for me to come up with this. I haven't found someone new YET? hahaha and it will be two years since i last saw him. plus its getting cold these days. it's just OUR season. i miss him warming up my cold legs. i miss him. PLUS PLUS PLUS. i was watching we got married AGAIN. and i managed to finish it. until the jeju part. and that made me super yes SUPER sad. anyway.. so i looked back to our pictures. i NEVER do that. i can't. i don't know why but every time i do, i feel like he's watching me as well. so i NEVER EVER click that folder...

i just finished watching the latest drama that maDe my heart skipped a beat and i am so sad but at the same time feeling so kiLig about iT and actually wanting the same happily ever after in iT.. bUt nOw i am jusT so noT feeliNg it aNd this feeling forced me to do this... supposedly i am to enjoy this moment and sleep happily but because of this it ruined my moment so i am really frustrated and finally realized i am at this ENOUGH. i have finally reached ENOUGH.. its actually great that i can finally describe what ENOUGH feels like.. ow wait i canT.. :D i've been planning to do this for a long time now but today i really felt the need to do it NOW. its not that i am giving up 'coz really i dont wanna put it in my nature. lets just say i'm doing this because i came to love myself more than i love you. *and yes i do love you* this one is worse than the previous one we had. coz this time i really kept my hopes high. i really want to see what will happen in the future. i ...

I probably shouldn't say this But at times I get so scared When I think about the previous Relationship we shared It was awesome but we lost it It's not possible for me, not to care And now we're standing in the rain But nothing's ever gonna change until you hear, my dear The 7 things I hate about you The 7 things I hate about you, oh you You're vain, your games, you're insecure You love me, you like her You make me laugh, you make me cry I don't know which side to buy Your friends, they're jerks When you act like them, just know it hurts I wanna be with the one I know And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do You make me love you It's awkward and it's silent As I wait for you to say What I need to hear now Your sincere apology When you mean it, I'll believe it If you text it, I'll delete it Let's be clear Oh I'm not coming back You're taking 7 steps here The 7 things I hate about you You're vain, your games, you'r...

i dont knOw why i'm writing a bLog right nOw.. i didn't even think that i can write a blog.. actually i dont think i can do anything at this point of time.. all i want to do is to disappeaR and wisHed i haD never exisTed.. you mighT saY that my sOrrOw is tO exaGerated buT that is reaLLy trUe.. the reasoN behind iT.. broKen hearT.. faiLed expectatiOns, regreTs.. aNd sO mucH mOre.. brokeN hearT.. weeKs agO.. i decided tO end somethiNg i didn'T think will have a greaT effect on me toDay.. yuP i knOw that this coulD be oNe of my greaTest regreT.. i'M feeLing sO dOwn todaY.. i dOnT tHinK i have tHe strengtH tO coNtinUe.. i woulD never trY tO deNy that he used to be my life and if he ever lefT me i wouLd die.. buT i never thOugHt that he is sTiLL gOing tO be mY liFe aNd todaY i just feeL like dyiNg.. i wisHed i jusT chOse tO beaR aLL tthe pain aNd coNtinUe everytHing witH hiM.. aT firsT reaLLY i waS tHinKing that tHis is nOtHiNg.. becaUse i didn'T feLt the feeliNg i haD w...

He Wasn't There's not much going on today. I'm really bored, it's getting late. What happened to my Saturday? Monday's coming, the day I hate. Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone. He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no. He wouldn't even open up the door. He never made me feel like I was special. He isn't really what I'm looking for. This is when I start to bite my nails. And clean my room when all else fails. I think it's time for me to bail. This point of view is getting stale. Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone. He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no. He wouldn't even open up the door. He never made me feel like I was special. He isn't really what I'm looking for. we've all got choices. we've all got voices. stand up make some noise. Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone. He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no. He wouldn't even open up the door. He never made me feel like I was ...

"I want you to love me, but I dont think you will." I wander around as I repeat this to myself It's the only answer I have, even if I'm scared of getting hurt. I'll say "I love you" to the one I love Do you love me or not? I don't care what the answer is, I just need to know! No matter how badly I desire to be with you There are many unchangeable things in this world and my love for you can't be stopped by anyone As 1000 nights pass, I long to tell you I have to let you know "I want you to love me, but I don't think you will." I wander around as I repeat this to myself It's the only answer I have, even if I'm scared of getting hurt. I'll say "I love you" to the one I love Putting these feelings into words is so scary but I'll say "I love you" to the one I love The happiness we chance upon in our lives can't be expressed in words That's why we can only smile Why we...